"....Ross breaks down every aspect of the Critic and its tactics, always in sharp succinct language designed to be remembered....By skillfully...[describing] both the tactics and the component parts of the...Critic, Ross constructs a series of straightforward approaches to fixing the problem....This kind of frank, no-nonsense advice will be invaluable to many readers accustomed to the...generalities of most self-help books...."                                                                                  --Kirkus Review 

"Reading this book has helped me to shift one of the most basic habits that I now see has been directly in the way of my happiness and goals."                                                 Tim Britton, Fairfield, IA

"I am loving the book. Wonderfully clear and simple and easy to read."                                        Julie Manderino, Ph.D, Fairfield, IA

"I received your book and REALLY like it. It was very helpful and "right on". I definitely would recommend this book to therapists and couples."                                           BV, Psychologist, Chicago

"I read this book thinking it would solidify blaming the other person. After reading the book, I did a 180 and now recognize the Critic in me is the problem, not others. Very insightful."                                                                                         Neal Gritz, Fairfield, IA

INTRODUCTION TO STOPPING YOUR INNER CRITIC

​Most of us have a negative thought process operating just below the surface of the mind. It is name-calling (e.g. "I'm not good enough," "I'm a loser" and so on). I characterize this thought process as the Critic.

From below the surface, the Critic is verbally attacking you. You are generally not aware of the particular language, but only its effects....moods, reactions, attitudes, insecurities. The Critic can cause you to feel depressed, guilty, irritated, judgmental, inhibited, unworthy, unappreciated, inferior undesirable… the list goes on and on. You experience the effects without recognizing the cause.

I have had two objectives in the writing of this book. The first is to give a thorough and detailed account of the nature of the Critic and the many ways it operates within us. The second is to keep my account clear and simple.

Parts I and II give a clear picture of how the Critic operates. Part III helps you to recognize it in the moment, and part IV gives the strategy to reduce and eventually stop it. Part V teaches you how to prevent anger reactions, and Part VI teaches couples how to prevent arguments.

I have been using this book (in its various evolving forms) with my classes and clients since 1989. It is a teaching instrument. I hope you find it clarifying and useful. I invite your feedback.




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